


I may enjoy faking it

by newtmasdoesthedo



Series: Well, except Newt. He calls me Tommy. [6]
Category: The Maze Runner (2014), The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Fake Relationship, M/M, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-18
Updated: 2014-10-21
Packaged: 2018-02-21 17:10:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2475941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newtmasdoesthedo/pseuds/newtmasdoesthedo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Yeah, okay, so our friends have been betting on when we’re getting together. And we decided to trick them. Well, Thomas decided to trick them. We had Chuck place a bet, we’re gonna pretend to be in a relationship.”</p><p>The choked sound his sister made had him wincing. He was sort of glad, sort of disappointed that she agreed with him that this was a terrible idea. She went into a longer rant about him getting his heart broken and her having to come home and pick him up off the floor when their parents failed, and he laughed softly. “I know, okay? I know it’s a terrible idea, but I can’t say no to him. The thing is, I need to know what to wear tonight.”</p><p>Naya groaned on the line, and he totally got her. He was being an idiot and he knew it. “I’m sorry okay! I’m bloody sorry, but I need the bloody buggers to believe that I’m trying to impress him.”</p><p>Naya snorted again. “Which you’re clearly not.”</p><p>“Exactly.” Another groan. “Okay maybe a little.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In which Thomas gets a horrible idea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [divagando](https://archiveofourown.org/users/divagando/gifts).



> 1\. Prompted by [newmas](http://newmas.tumblr.com) of Tumblr as a part of [this challenge](http://newtmasdoesthedo.tumblr.com/post/99486012115/oops-made-a-newmas-bingo-card-lets-be-real-im). Also please kudos and feedback and all that jazz.  
> 2\. Yet again I demonstrate my complete lack of self-control and make what should've been a oneshot into a three-chapter-fic. I felt like this was getting long so I'm splitting it up in three chapters. The second part is almost done, though, so I'll probably post it tonight or tomorrow anyway.  
> 3\. I sort of have an excuse because two anons prompted this trope from me as well so there's a chapter for each person *nods enthusiastically and tries to tell myself that I have everything under control*  
> 4\. Rating will DEFINITELY change next chapter. There will be smut because I love this trope so much and I can't help myself. You've been warned.  
> 5\. I've grown to like Naya, who is Newt's little sister in the High School verse, so I'm probably just going to keep using her as Newt's sister when I need him to have one. In this one she's the older one of them, though. You'll see why.

_”They did what?!”_  
  
Chuck laughed nervously, looking between Thomas and Newt, obviously uncertain of whether or not he should consider cutting out his own tongue. If he didn’t Alby and Minho actually might if they found out that he’d busted them, and he was pretty certain they’d only be more annoyed with him if he spilled the beans even further. The thing was, though, that Thomas and Newt were standing in front of him, and he didn’t even know if the blonde or the brunette looked more menacing right now, but he smiled nervously again, fidgeting slightly and moving backwards just a tad before two hands shot out and grabbed his shirt in perfect synchronization. “I mean, you must be able to see why they’d bet on you guys, you’re so in sync and you’re basically joined at the hip…”  
  
Newt growled dangerously in front of him, and Chuck let out another small laugh, trying once again to back away and turning his attention to Thomas because he always seemed to make more space for Chuck to be an annoying little shit. He felt a surge of relief when he recognized Thomas’ most mischievous smile and the brunette let go of his shirt and put a hand on Newt’s wrist. “Chuck, if Newt lets go now, you’re not running, okay?” Chuck nodded, relieved that Thomas was smiling and sort of hoping that he could get Newt to come down.  
  
Newt rarely lost his temper. He was a pretty calm guy, but when he did he was absolutely terrifying. That warm brown could go from warm to burning in a matter of seconds, so when his shoulders relaxed just a bit Chuck felt like he was home safe. Okay safer, but still.  
  
“I got an idea.”  
  
“Make it a good one, Tommy, I don’t want to have to murder my favourite junior.” Newt growled, and Chuck took a step to the side, making sure that Thomas was between the two of them because he trusted that Thomas would shield him for at least long enough to give him a head-start (which he would need) if Newt decided to beat the living hell out of him, and though it wouldn’t really fit Newt’s normal way of looking at him, Chuck wondered if today was going to be the day where their pacifist friend made an exception.  
  
Thomas nodded, obviously collecting his thoughts, musing on the issue and turning his gaze to Chuck. “Okay, how much money did they bet? And how exactly does it work?”  
  
Chuck cocked his head slightly, thinking that he might have started to see what Thomas was getting at. “Uhm, about 600 dollars actually, it’s a lot of money, Minho bet a lot because his mom told him to ‘invest’. I don’t think that’s what she had in mind, but Thomas, they’re not going to just believe me because I said you hooked up, they’ll want their money back if they don’t get any proof.”  
  
Thomas nodded, a smug smile creeping onto his face and looked over at Newt. “You up for a bit of casual making out?”  
  
Newt blinked. Then his hand clenched and he punches Thomas on the arm, _hard._ Hard enough that Thomas actually winced and rubbed it. “Come on, Newt, I could totally use 250 dollars.”  
  
“Why $ 250?” Newt asked, obviously hoping to convince Thomas that his idea was stupid by mere logic. That was definitely a mistake, and Chuck was sort of surprised that he didn’t know Thomas any better than that. Logic had never stopped him before.  
  
Thomas nodded towards Chuck. “This loser made bets on us, so he isn’t going to get $ 200 for himself, but we can’t give him nothing, he’s going to place a bet for us so we can split it afterwards. $ 250 for me, $ 250 for you, $ 100 for the squirt.”  
  
“I’m not that much younger than you, you know.” Chuck piped up, quickly silenced when Newt shot him a warning glance. “Okay okay. I’ll do it if Newt will.”  
  
Newt’s burning glare was turned to Thomas instead. “No.”  
  
“Come on, Newt!” the brunette whined, turning huge brown eyes to Newt and sticking out his lower lip, and Newt looked like he wanted to punch him again, and in the face this time.  
  
“I said _no,_ Tommy, it’s a horrible idea, we’ll never be able to pull it off, and Minho is going to see right through it, we’ve known him since we were in kindergarten, you know he won’t go for this.” He argued, shaking his head, and Chuck barely resisted the urge to smack himself in the face because really?  
  
Thomas just stuck out his lower lip more and whined in the back of his throat. “Are you saying that you wouldn’t be able to make people think you found me attractive? I’m wounded, Newt, wounded I tell you. I’ll need plenty of beer tonight to get over it. Plenty, I tell you, and you’ll have to drink with me because you’re my best friend, and then your defences will be down and I’ll take horrible, horrible advantage of you. I’ll get to kiss you.” He stated, going from pout to smirk, and Chuck almost gagged at the sight.  
  
It was so obvious.  
  
It was so fucking obvious and the idiots couldn’t even see it.  
  
“You wouldn’t.” Newt stated, and Thomas shrugged happily.  
  
“Wouldn’t I?”  
  
Nauseating. Nothing less.  
  
“Are we doing it or not? I don’t want to place the bet if you’re not going to do it, I don’t have $ 100 to risk, okay?” Chuck muttered, wanting to get away from this disgusting display of badly supressed emotions. It was obvious that Thomas actually wanted to kiss Newt but was too scared to do anything about it without having an excuse, and probably even more obvious that Newt didn’t want to risk it because he was scared that this was just a game to Thomas. The stupid mutual crush was obvious enough that all their friends had bet on how soon it would happen for ages.  
  
Newt crossed his arms in front of his chest, staring Thomas down as Thomas went back to pouting. To no effect at all, seeing as both idiots were equally stubborn. In the end Thomas gave up, straightening his back. “Newt, if you don’t want to that’s fine, I get it, you think the thought is disgusting-“ Newt started protesting, but Thomas kept talking, “And that’s totally fine, your ass is way too skinny for me anyway,” he flashed Newt a smile, but the short look of hurt on his face wasn’t wasted on Chuck who stomped on Thomas’ foot hard, “Ow, Jesus man, relax, it was a joke, I think Newt’s ass is pretty amazing,” Thomas continued, so caught up in his own sales-pitch that the blush that now crept on Newt’s cheeks were lost on him, “But just think – you won’t have to take all those extra shifts you talked about next year if you do it. I’ll even give you my $ 50, then you’ll get 300, half.”  
  
The final argument and the compliment to his ass seemed to win Newt over. Maybe he realized that he couldn’t keep fighting it without giving himself a way, ‘cause Thomas might be a bit stupid when it came to love and the like, but he wasn’t an idiot. He was pretty damn smart, actually, and Chuck wondered for the millionth time how Newt still hadn’t realized that Thomas had been head-over-heels in love with him for about two years now. They were two stupid buggers, Chuck knew that much.  
  
“Fine. I’ll do it, but if you make any stupid jokes I’m out. No dick-jokes.” He said sternly, and Thomas shot him a sad glance, obviously already having stocked up on them. Once again Chuck almost gagged, but he sighed deeply instead. Idiots.  
  
“So, are you going to make out tonight or whatever? When do I need to place my bet for?” he asked, and Newt seemed to actually get a bit into the idea.  
  
He seemed to ponder exactly how they could best do this, biting his lip slightly, and once again Chuck had to wonder how the idiots ever got anything done without him, because really, Thomas’ gaze was instantly drawn to slim lips, and Chuck wanted to shake both of them, but decided against it. Maybe this silly bet could fix things up between the two of them. “Tonight is a good a night as any I guess.  But why would you suddenly place a bet for tonight? We need to give them a reason.” He speculated, and Thomas seemed to catch his drift and started wondering as well.  
  
“What could we be doing all afternoon that made you think that we’d get together tonight of all nights?” Thomas wondered, looking at Chuck questioningly. “Come on, squirt, you’re the one who’s been betting on us, what is it that we do, that makes you think that we’re just waiting to tear each other’s clothes off and fuck each other silly?” he asked, and Chuck grimaced.  
  
“Thanks for that visual, Greenie.”  
  
Thomas smirked. “You’re welcome, I’m quite enjoying it myself.”  
  
Disgusting.  
  
Chuck pointed his finger straight in his face, “Jokes like that one. Jokes like that one are what make us think you’re just waiting to hook up.” He stated, trying to convey his disgust in one single sentence. If there was anything he didn’t need, it was graphic details of any of his friend’s sex-lives, imaginary or not. Somehow he felt like Thomas had been giving that some thought before, and the thought of Thomas jacking one out… gross. “Okay I have an idea. You guys go out for coffee or something. Or drinks. Or buy some alcohol or get someone to buy some for you, and then take a picture. If anyone asks if they can go drinking with you before the party, tell them no. Tell them you’d like it to just be the two of you. And if you’re having coffee put pictures of each other on Facebook or Instagram or whatever. If Newt can do his embarrassed look, that’s great.” Chuck instructed, exasperated that he had to think for all of them, because honestly, that was just plain stupid. They were supposed to be smart guys.  
  
Thomas looked at Newt with childish glee on his face. “What nervous look? The one where you smile and look down?”  
  
And then Newt did the face, and Chuck considered ending it all right then and there because this was really getting out of hand. “Yes. That face. I can’t believe you know the face you make him make. You’re both annoying. I’m gonna go now. Go on your non-date.” He sulked, leaving the room before they could make him despise them further. Some fucking people just couldn’t help thinking with their dicks. Or hearts. Whatever motivated the idiots to love each other when they were both so stupid.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
“So, alcohol or coffee?” Thomas asked when Chuck had finally left, and Newt bit the inside of his cheek slightly, shrugging. Either suited him fine. He always enjoyed being in Thomas’ company, maybe that was why they’d just been friends since the day they met. The guy was so easy to be around, and maybe Newt had always had a bit of a crush and only just realized it recently. It was weird, ‘cause he, Thomas and Minho had always been sort of a trio, and it wasn’t like Minho was any less of their friend because they hung out together a lot. They seemed to have found a balance where they were both a trio and a duo, which was probably a bit weird, but it didn’t really matter so much, since Minho didn’t seem to mind giving them some space and hanging out with some of his other friends instead. Good thing Minho was such a popular dude, because Newt had found himself wanting to be alone with Thomas more and more. He didn’t want Minho to find out about his crush – but it seemed like that had been a stupid thing to worry about if almost all of their friends thought they were in love with each other.  
  
At least it seemed like they thought this about both of them, which meant that Newt wasn’t getting his stupid crush outed in that sense. Thomas seemed to find it funny, Newt himself… well, he’d been hesitant about doing this because he felt like he was taking advantage of Thomas. He wasn’t sure Thomas would want to do this if he knew that his smile was the one Newt thought about before going to bed at night.  
  
None the less, he was going to have to push through this. He didn’t want Thomas to grow suspicious. So it would be a couple of pecks, nothing major, it wasn’t like they’d have to make out in front of everyone, so they’d be fine. It’d be totally PG, and he wouldn’t be taking advantage of Thomas’ body, although it was definitely worth taking advantage of.  
  
Thomas was a work of art. Being so good friends they’d been to the beach together several times during the summer, and Newt had a bloody hard time keeping it in his pants when he looked at the other guy, so he’d tried not to. And worn sunglasses all the time, but that was an entirely different matter.  
  
Thomas was ripped, but not in the overly buff way. His frame was balanced, his muscles were defined but slender, his shoulders were wide and his waist slim, and Newt basically wanted every single inch of him. It was a problem really, when just the thought of Thomas in swim-trunks could make his mouth go completely dry. He decided that alcohol wasn’t a good idea, so he stuck his hands in his pockets and met Thomas’ gaze again, “Coffee, definitely. I’m bloody tired, I’ll need caffeine if I’m going to be any fun to be around tonight.”  
  
Thomas’ answering smile was somewhere between wicked and excited. “You’re gonna be fun alright.” He stated, and Newt grimaced.  
  
“Gross, mate.”  
  
“Nah, you like it.” Thomas said, and Newt felt a slight stab to his heart because Thomas had no idea how right he was.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
“Come on, smile!” Thomas urged happily, looking like he had an incredible time making Newt blush and itch to move into his lap. It was a problem, really, that Thomas was such a bundle of sunshine, because every time he smiled at Newt, Newt felt his insides clench with longing. He allowed himself to imagine for just a second how amazing it would be if he could sit down in Thomas’ lap for just two seconds and kiss him on the corner of the mouth and then move to his own seat, like couples did. So basically he wanted to be Thomas’ doting boyfriend, but so what? He couldn’t help himself, and he wasn’t acting on it, so allowing himself small fantasies like that couldn’t be _so_ wrong, could it? No. Newt was certain that this was okay. He wasn’t going to hell for this. He wasn’t using Thomas. _Yet._

  
“Yes, that one was really good! It’s perfect, you made the face!” the brunette exclaimed happily, snapping another picture when Newt flipped him off while rolling his eyes and smiling fondly. “I’m gonna put up both of them on Facebook and Instagram, they’re both really good.” He stated, and Newt wrinkled his forehead.  
  
“Since when do you have Instagram?” he asked, mildly confused because none of them had ever really been the social-media-types.  
  
Thomas flashed him another bright smile and took a sip of his coffee, managing to burn his tongue, and Newt sighed and handed him a glass of cold water, receiving another smile as a reward. “Since today, I made one so I could put up pictures of our couple-y adventures.” He stated, and Newt felt like he did a pretty good job of pretending that he wasn’t impressed by that at all.  
  
“Aha. Don’t you think you’re enjoying this a bit too much?”  
  
Thomas just smirked, “I’m making $ 200 by tricking our stupid friends, buddy, I don’t think I could enjoy this more.”  
  
Well that was a slap in the face. Newt had known that Thomas only did this for the money, but being reminded of it wasn’t exactly pleasant. Entertaining the idea that they could actually be something was a very comfortable fantasy, and he would have liked to keep it for a couple of days before his heart was going to be broken in two. “Yeah. I can tell.” He muttered, pulling his fingers through his hair and leaning back in the chair. “About the money, mate, I don’t need 50 of yours, I just didn’t think it was a great idea. Still not sure I do. But I don’t want your bloody money. You’re as much of a part of this as I am. You’re gonna get half.”  
  
Thomas just shrugged. “Sure, if you don’t want it. If you don’t want to do it…” he started, but Newt shook his head. Now he’d decided. He was going to do it, even if it was the worst idea in the history of the world.  
  
“No, it’s fine. We’re gonna do it, we’re gonna make the bloody money, and then you’re gonna leave it, ya stupid bugger.” He muttered under his breath, and Thomas smiled sheepishly at him, sipping his coffee again while he left Newt to read his book in peace, occasionally snapping a picture of him and sending to their friends on snapchat with some witty captions that Newt didn’t even want to ask about. They had Thomas _giggling_ and it worried him a bit, but he decided that his life would be happier if he didn’t know.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
A text ticked in a couple of hours after the first picture had come up, telling that Chuck had placed the bet, and Thomas announced this to Newt so happily that Newt almost couldn’t bear to roll his eyes at him. But of course he did, because really Tommy? Fucking really? He forced himself not to sigh, though, because it would have come out as long-suffering more than anything else, and he didn’t want Thomas to start wondering why he was so much against this stupid plan. It was going to go terribly wrong. Newt could feel it in his bones. He was certain that they were going to get busted and it would end up with Thomas somehow finding out about his stupid crush, and everything would be ruined. Or maybe he was just psyching himself out. At least Thomas wasn’t dating anyone. That was good, right? That meant that Newt could still entertain these ridiculous little fantasies that his friend would somehow change his mind.  
  
So, all of this meant that Newt was still mulling over everything when they parted, having decided to go home and change for the party, because Newt was a couple of sizes smaller than Thomas, and he couldn’t fit any of the guy’s clothes without looking like a kid trying on his big brother’s stuff – which was a really disturbing mental image, so he pushed it away and settled for calling up his sister, who was right now at college. “Naya?”  
  
“Yeah?” her voice sounded through the phone, cracking up slightly because of bad reception.  
  
He knew that his voice must’ve sounded really vulnerable, because she sounded worried and it made him feel bad about even calling to disturb her in the first place. He knew that she was busy with her studies. “I need your help. Are you busy?”  
  
And of course she wasn’t. Never too busy for her little brother, and that shouldn’t have made him feel as good as it did, but it really did. “I’m never busy when you’re the one asking, honey, you know that.” she assured him, and he smiled a bit, letting himself let out a small jolt of laughter.  
  
“I know, you’re always there. Uhm, the thing is… do you remember Thomas?”  
  
The incredulous snort matched the ones he usually made so well he almost cheered up by the thought. “Do I remember the stupid friend you’ve had a crush on forever? Yes I do. You guys used to steal my bras and shit.”  
  
Newt smiled fondly at the thought. They’d done a lot of stupid shit when they were younger, that much was true, and even if Thomas didn’t like him the way Newt wanted him to, that was fine, because he was one of the best friends Newt had ever had, and if nothing else they had a lot of great memories together.  
  
“Yeah, okay, so our friends have been betting on when we’re getting together. And we decided to trick them. Well, Thomas decided to trick them. We had Chuck place a bet, we’re gonna pretend to be in a relationship.”  
  
The choked sound his sister made had him wincing. He was sort of glad, sort of disappointed that she agreed with him that this was a terrible idea. She went into a longer rant about him getting his heart broken and her having to come home and pick him up off the floor when their parents failed, and he laughed softly. “I know, okay? I know it’s a terrible idea, but I can’t say no to him. The thing is, I need to know what to wear tonight.”  
  
Naya groaned on the line, and he totally got her. He was being an idiot and he knew it. “I’m sorry okay! I’m bloody sorry, but I need to bloody buggers to believe that I’m trying to impress him.”  
  
Naya snorted again. “Which you’re clearly not.”  
  
“Exactly.” Another groan. “Okay maybe a little.”  
  
His sister sighed deeply, and Newt felt a bit bad about making her worry about him like this, but he couldn’t really help himself. He needed someone’s advice, and if not his big sister’s, he didn’t know whose. She was the one person that had always been there, his entire life. His mother was flaky, she tended to forget even the most basic stuff, and though Naya was only two years older than him, they’d always taken care of each other. His father… well, who knew really. Thomas and Minho had come later. They’d been almost as big a part of taking care of Newt as Naya. Minho’s family had all but adopted him when he was a kid, Minho’s mother and father (who was money-coming-out-of-the-arse-rich) had invited Naya and Newt over for dinner regularly (Naya had been friends with Minho’s older brother) and that was all fine and dandy, but when everything came down to it there were only three people on this earth Newt trusted, and that was Naya, Minho and Thomas. He was immensely grateful to Minho’s parents, but he was painfully aware that they had children of their own to take care of, and Newt and Naya would always just be people they helped when it was convenient, he was certain of it.  
  
Luckily his sister was there to keep him from bumming himself out too much. “Newt, make yourself a cup of coffee. Do you still have those ridiculous skinny jeans that I told you to throw out a million times so I could buy you new ones?”  
  
Newt nodded, then remembered that Naya couldn’t see him and went to the kitchen and started making more coffee with the phone squeezed between his shoulder and ear, “Yeah? What about the bloody things?”  
  
“It’s time for them to make one last appearance. If they can’t make Thomas rip them to pieces nothing can.”  
  
Newt made a strangled sound in the back of his throat, “That’s bloody _disgusting_ , you’re my _sister._ You’re supposed to hate the thought of me getting laid!” Naya was laughing her ass off on the other end of the phone.  
  
“Oh Newt. You won’t get laid. You’re my delicate little flower, I think it's safe to say that your virginity is safe for tonight. I’m certain of it. I just hope Thomas gets frustrated enough to ruin the fucking things before they fall apart on their own and embarrass you. And wear a button shirt, no tie, it makes you look older.” She instructed, and Newt mimicked her yapping with an eye roll although she couldn’t see it, finishing making his coffee without spilling any on himself in the process.  
  
“Thanks, your beliefs in my seductive skills are very flattering.” He muttered, taking the first sip.  
  
“Put some of mom’s liquor in your coffee, it’ll give you courage. Good luck. I gotta go if you’re okay now?”  
  
At least if everything went to shit he still had an amazing sister. “Thanks, I’m fine. I will be.”  
  
“Thomas is a good guy. He wouldn’t hold you having emotions against you. You know that, don’t you? He’s not going to leave.” Naya assured, the line cracking up a bit again, and Newt’s eyes stung a bit, but his heart was pounding a bit harder because he knew that she was right.  
  
“Yeah. Yeah I know.”


	2. In which Thomas' idea shows itself to actually be pretty good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I know why!” Thomas stated happily, snapping his fingers as though he’d had an epiphany, and Newt shook his head softly, trying to figure out why he was in love with this idiot, and while he was lost in that train of thought Thomas moved to stand in front of him, demanding his full attention. “It’s because I haven’t gotten to snog you yet.”
> 
> Newt’s eyebrows shot up before he could stop himself, “Snog? Tommy, you can’t say snogging in an American accent, you sound like a major prick.”
> 
> But he didn’t get much further in his scathing remarks because Thomas was moving closer, and the next sentence died in his throat when brown eyes neared, and he cleared his throat, sank a lump, did whatever he could think of to do something about the way his mouth went completely dry. Nothing helped at all, and it felt like everything moved in slow motion when Thomas finally closed the last bit of distance between them, hands planted on either side of Newt’s face, and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. This part is for an _anon_ of Tumblr. First part was for [newmas](http://newmas.tumblr.com) and the third part will be for another anon. Shoutout to newmas for figuring out exactly where I was going with this fic, like, not even missing a beat.  
>  2\. You can thank [second-in-command-newt](http://second-in-command-newt.tumblr.com</a) of tumblr for me posting this chapter now, I was losing my motivation to proof-read it, but then I got a lovely message <3 Thanks for being so nice, babe!  
> 3\. Here's some smut and angst. I'm not sorry at all.  
> 4\. Working on third installment already because I'm sort of in the grove with this verse and when I finish this I'll take a small break from prompts and do some of the second installments for the other verses I have, hope that's fine with everyone <3  
> 5\. Thank you so much for your support, you guys. Like, every single kudos and comment and message on tumblr genuinely makes me so happy. It means _a lot_  
>  6\. VERY IMPORTANT: I'm upping the rating for this chapter A LOT. There's smut. You've been warned.

The loud wolf-whistle when Thomas walked into the door would have been enough to make a hardened sailor blush, and Newt definitely wasn’t an exception. Thomas had an annoying sort of charm, one that made you want to either punch him or snog him silly, and it was always sort of hard to find out which one he wanted the most. But not really, not at all. He wanted to kiss Thomas basically every hour of every day, and now definitely wasn’t an exception.  
  
“Don’t do that.” he ordered, finishing off his beer and putting the empty bottle on the table.  
  
“Why not? I’m getting into character.” Thomas stated, a shit-eating grin on his face that made Newt wonder why they were actually friends. What a dick. “I mean, I’m one lucky dude if I’m getting to tap that ass.” he continued, until Newt shoved at his shoulder and rolled his eyes for what felt like the millionth time this day. “Come on, don’t be so grumpy, no one will believe that we’re dating if you look like you want to shove me against a wall most of the time. Wanna practice making out so it looks natural?”  
  
_I_ do _want to shove you against the wall, but not like that, you massive douchebag._  
  
Newt already felt an eye-twitch building. It was going to be a long night. Everything would’ve been so much easier if Thomas didn’t spent half his time being an irresistible piece of shit and the other half being an insufferable jerk. “No. It’s going to be our first kiss, remember?” Newt asked, hoping that Thomas would just leave it and let him get out of it without asking too many questions. He’d have to get drunker if he was going to make out with Thomas without sitting down and crying when he remembered that they weren’t actually dating. It was awful.  
  
He sent his sister a nice thought, none the less, because Naya had obviously made a great choice with the jeans. Maybe Thomas didn’t mean it the way he was supposed to mean it if they’d actually been dating, but he was noticing Newt’s ass looking great (which it did, Newt owned a bloody mirror, thank you, and he’d checked several times that the pants weren’t actually falling apart the way Naya had claimed.) and that was a good thing.  
  
“Ready to go?” Thomas asked, moving to the fridge to grab a cold beer. “Want me to get you one? We’ll walk over there, right? Don’t want to have to drive tonight.”  
  
Newt just nodded mutely, then realizing that Thomas couldn’t see him when he was halfway into the kitchen, and he called out his yes instead, dazed at how good Thomas looked. With the tanned skin and a light-blue button shirt and his hair carefully styled to look like it wasn’t styled at all, Thomas was attractive enough, but the fucker had put on a tie that was hanging loosely around his neck. It made Newt wonder if he should have put more liquor in his coffee. He honestly wasn’t sure he could get through the night without randomly popping a boner when Thomas looked like that. It was going to be a long, long night, so he moved over to his mother’s drink cabinet to get himself a shot of vodka before going out the door. Thomas returned while he was in the middle of it, and he cocked an eyebrow.  
  
“Is the thought of kissing me so bad you have to drown it in alcohol? That’s really hurtful, buddy.” He smirked, and Newt had a hard time telling whether or not he was joking, so he just snorted and took the beer from Thomas’ hand, assuming that he was. Because honestly, what else was he going to think when he smiled that smile, except for, you know, that he was trying to break Newt’s bloody heart in half? He quenched a sigh and nodded towards the door, forcing a smile on his face because he didn’t want Thomas to think that he was angry with him. It wasn’t Thomas’ fault that Newt had been nursing a pathetic crush on him for years now.  
  
And he was going to make an effort to keep hiding that fact, even if this whole situation was going to make it a lot harder, because he wanted Thomas in his life, and he was going to be a decent fucking person about this instead of packing up and leaving when he inevitably got hurt. Thomas had done too much for him, was too much of a friend for him to just leave. Newt didn’t just care about him because he had a crush. Newt valued Thomas too much as a friend to ever really consider leaving him.  
He couldn’t and he wouldn’t, so he put on a slight smile and let Thomas open his beer for him and took a sip. “So, how’re we gonna go about this? Just have fun and see what happens?” Thomas asked, and Newt could do nothing but shrug. He wanted to plan things out further so he wasn’t caught off guard, but he was pretty damn sure he couldn’t explain to Thomas exactly why without busting himself and make a major fool of himself. So instead he just ended up nodding, taking a healthy swig of his bottle before sending Thomas another small smile.  
  
“You’re really into this, aren’t you?”  
  
Thomas nodded happily, “The jerks aren’t going to get away with betting on us like that. We can decide on our own who we want to be with and when, they don’t get to decide when we have our first kiss.”  
  
And Newt’s heart instantly jumped into his throat because that made it sound like Thomas actually _wanted_ to have a first kiss with _him,_ and he just couldn’t allow himself to believe that. “Nah, you’re right. It is sort of a wanker move.” He agreed, hoping that he managed to pull off indifference, but not really certain. He was thankful that it was dark because it hid his blush, and he really hoped that Minho hadn’t decided to turn on all the lights in his house because he might need to hide something more if Thomas was going to be this close all night. His friend was all but holding his hand, bumping shoulders and sometimes the backs of their hands together, and it was sort of hard for Newt to keep remembering that this wasn’t a real relationship. If it was this hard already the night would probably end up being torture.  
  
Thomas just nodded and flashed him another one of those bright smiles, and somehow it reassured Newt that maybe, just maybe, things might be okay.  
  
That was until they arrived at the party, of course, and Thomas instantly put an arm around his shoulders, discarding the now-empty bottle in one of the trashcan Minho had put up on the way from the gate to the house. Only Minho’s parents wouldn’t notice something like this. Maybe because they travelled a lot and Minho’s very generous allowance allowed him to call in someone to clean it all up if he couldn’t make it himself, the lucky bastard. Newt couldn’t really bring himself to be jealous of him for real, not in the way where he’d ever wish that Minho didn’t have the stuff he did at least.  
  
He’d used to be really jealous of his family, of the way they always took care of each other, but he knew that Minho had his issues too, and he had Naya, and really that was all he needed in the terms of a family.  
  
“Do you have to stand this close?” he asked, when they were at the door and Thomas flashed him a bright smile, nodding before the door opened. “Hi Minho.” Newt greeted, and Minho looked almost incredulous when he saw the two of them. The touching wasn’t that weird, it wasn’t that different, but maybe combined with Chuck’s bet and the pictures Minho was starting to get worried about his money – with good reason.  
  
“Hey bro!” Thomas greeted happily (loudly) and Newt almost rolled his eyes when Minho answered with a greeting that was almost as loud. The two of them could be truly insufferable in each other’s company, and when the bruh-thing had started he really didn’t know, he just knew that it was annoying as hell. He wasn’t even certain if they were being sarcastic or if they meant it.  
  
 Thomas dragged him inside, and Newt didn’t get to wonder more at weird American customs before a couple of beers were shoved in their hands by Gally and Chuck all-but-dragged them out of the living-room to one of the many pool-chairs outside, Minho following calmly and Alby joining them soon after. Chuck made sure to sit down right next to Thomas, making it impossible for Newt to do the same thing. Was the little shit trying to sabotage them? When he turned around he found that Alby and Minho had already sat down on the one across from Thomas, and now Newt stood there, not knowing what to do. Minho instantly stood up, offering his spot to Newt. “I can stand.” He pointed out, and Newt cocked an eyebrow. So that was how it was, huh? Minho was going to try to delay so he could win the bet. Newt pursed his lips slightly, darting his glance to Thomas, whose mind seemed to be working full-time.  
  
And then Newt was pulled into his lap just the way he’d been fantasizing mere hours before, and he almost choked on his beer. “It’s fine.” Thomas said cheerfully, “Newt isn’t that heavy, he can sit on me.”  
  
Newt shot a dirty look at Chuck. He was never going to under-estimate the little shit again. He was pure evil, Newt was certain of it. It didn’t last that long, though, because Thomas put his arms around Newt’s waist and sent Minho and Alby a smile that made both of them look horribly grumpy. Newt elbowed him slightly, hoping that he could subdue Thomas’ intense sense of victory just a bit – so their victory wouldn’t be taken from them.  
  
Chuck just looked smug next to them. “So, how was coffee you two?” Newt was pretty sure if he rolled his eyes one more time they might just get stuck, so he didn’t, also because he didn’t want to put Minho and Alby on the track of what they were actually doing.  
  
“It was good,” Thomas stated, putting his chin on Newt’s shoulder and turning his head a bit so he could look at Chuck, ending up resting his cheek against him instead, and Newt hated how much he wanted to lean back into him. It shouldn’t feel so good just to be sitting in his lap, but it did and he decided to just enjoy it while it lasted and feel bad about it later, so he took a long swig of his beer and let Thomas do the talking for now. “We had a couple of cups, caught Newt’s shy-face and put it on Instagram.”  
  
“We saw. It was nauseating.” Minho grunted from opposite of them and Newt turned his gaze toward him, cocking an eyebrow and leaning back into Thomas demonstratively, not caring that he’d decided just seconds ago that he wouldn’t and that he was already breaking his promise to himself.  
  
Thomas shrugged behind him, and Newt turned to Chuck, smiling at him slightly and twirling his bottle between his fingers, “How’d the shopping with your mother go, Chuck? Get anything nice?” he tried, doing his best to change the topic and let the fact that he was sitting in Thomas’ bloody lap speak its own very clear language, and for just a couple of minutes everything seemed pretty normal. It seemed like they were doing just fine, like they could get through this, like _Newt_ could get through this without accidentally popping a boner, and it was good. Then Chuck randomly stood up and left, returning five minutes later with a tray of shots. _Shit._  
  
Newt quickly claimed the spot next to Thomas, wanting to relieve himself from some of the nervous tension he couldn’t quite get rid off in his former spot, and he wasn’t even surprised when Thomas scooted close. That part really wasn’t so different from the way things usually were between them, what made it stressful was that he knew that at some random point tonight Thomas might just kiss him. So every touch felt electric and filled with a tension that he knew was only his own. If Thomas would just get it over with, maybe Newt could stop telling himself that Thomas was going for it _now_ every single time the brunette moved the tiniest bit. He would never have the guts to initiate it himself, not even when Thomas was the one who’d suggested being part of this bloody bet. So he just sat here, strangely nervous, and getting alcohol in his blood wasn’t necessarily the wisest of ideas, but he certainly needed the liquid courage to stop fidgeting, so he grabbed two shots, one for Thomas and one for himself, and let Chuck worry about finding a new spot for himself.  
  
“Cheers!” they chorused, and everyone emptied their glasses respectively before Chuck pushed another into each hand. _Okay. A little more courage won’t hurt._  
  
Two hours and four shots later Newt had started regretting the decision to keep taking them until there was none left on the tray. He wasn’t _smashed_ but he certainly wasn’t sober either, and somehow they’d ended up back in the house. Thomas had only left his side all night to get them drinks or to take a piss, and Newt was starting to get really, _really_ jumpy, because Thomas had yet to kiss him. That had Newt half expecting him to do it any minute now, half expecting him to have lost his nerve, and that just sort of hurt. The thought definitely did nothing good for his mood, but luckily the alcohol kept him from thinking _too_ much about it. If Thomas didn’t want to kiss him then that was okay because Thomas and him were just friends. Thomas wasn’t even supposed to want to kiss him. And while Newt was bugging himself out with those thoughts, Thomas was actually talking to him, which Newt only realized when Thomas moved his hand in front of his eyes.  
  
“Newt, you okay?” he asked, looking a bit worried, and Newt nodded quickly.  
  
“Yeah, yeah I’m totally fine.” He claimed, unconvincingly, and Thomas frowned slightly.  
  
He seemed genuinely upset, and Newt sort of wanted to hug him when he did that puppy-dog look. “You still hate the plan.” The brunette stated, and Newt startled in surprise.  
  
“What, no! No, not that much, it’s just, I’m sort of nervous they’re figuring us out, Minho has been keeping an eye on us all night and I’m just not sure we’re fooling them.” He tried, scratching his cheek nervously, and he wasn’t lying. It wasn’t the only reason he was jumpy, but he wasn’t lying, so when Thomas nodded, looking like he was thinking long and hard, Newt was a bit relieved. If Thomas would just stop mulling over this maybe Newt would actually get out of this whole situation without having to make any embarrassing confessions, and that was all he could hope for right now, really.  
  
“I know why!” Thomas stated happily, snapping his fingers as though he’d had an epiphany, and Newt shook his head softly, trying to figure out why he was in love with this idiot, and while he was lost in that train of thought Thomas moved to stand in front of him, demanding his full attention. “It’s because I haven’t gotten to snog you yet.”  
  
Newt’s eyebrows shot up before he could stop himself, “Snog? Tommy, you can’t say snogging in an American accent, you sound like a major prick.”  
  
But he didn’t get much further with his scathing remarks because Thomas was moving closer, and the next sentence died in his throat when brown eyes neared. He tried clearing his throat, sank a lump, did whatever he could think of to do something about the way his mouth went completely dry. Nothing helped at all. It felt like everything moved in slow motion when Thomas finally closed the last bit of distance between them, hands planted on either side of Newt’s face, and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss.  
  
Newt had assumed that their kisses would be discrete. Only just enough to convince the others that they were dating, nothing wild. It wasn’t supposed sweep him completely off his feet.  
  
He could never have imagined the way Thomas’ soft, insistent lips moved against his, prompting a response out of him before he could do anything to stop himself. His fingers twitched, and before he could help himself one hand had fisted itself in Thomas’ shirt. The other one had found soft, brown hair, messing it up for real this time instead of that ridiculous hairdo that always made him want to bury his fingers in it and cling to Thomas. He kissed back the best he could, trying to keep a distance between their bodies lest he should have any unfortunate responses, but Thomas had other ideas, moving closer and basically covering all of Newt’s body with his own.  
  
It wasn’t like Newt had imagined it to be when he was fantasizing late at night, feeling dirty whenever he was finished. It was better. He’d imagined frantic, hurried kisses and when he’d let himself fantasize that something would happen for real he’d expected a drunken hook-up at most, because Newt just wasn’t that lucky.  
Newt didn’t get nice things. Newt didn’t get chocolate-y hair and amber eyes that shone with warmth, he didn’t get a smile that was just _pure_ happiness. He didn’t get Thomas’ soft touches and broad shoulders and the way one hand moved to rest so softly against his waist that it seemed like Thomas was afraid he might do something wrong.  
  
He had to remind himself that this wasn’t for real. This was just something they did to trick the others. Thomas wasn’t his boyfriend. But no matter how hard he tried to hold onto that thought, he ended up moving his hand from Thomas’ chest to his back, pressing it against defined back-muscle, and his mouth watered at the thought of getting to clutch at it while Thomas shagged him silly. A soft groan left his lips, and Thomas took that as his chance to lick into his mouth in slow, deliberate movements, as though he wanted to map out every single millimetre of it, making sure he’d never forget exactly what made Newt tick.  
  
“I think they’ve got the point, Tommy.” He managed to mutter under his breath when they finally broke away from each other, both breathing hard and in desperate need of some oxygen, but Thomas just shook his head and claimed his lips again, and this time it was exactly what Newt had fantasized about.  
  
It was Thomas nibbling at his bottom-lip, it was Thomas pushing his hips against Newt’s and eliciting a soft moan. It was Thomas moving to mouth at Newt’s neck when he tried to move his head. “Tommy, I’m serious, I don’t think there’s any doubt that-“  
  
A soft nip at his neck had his knees buckling, and words seemed to evade both of them when Thomas pulled back and looked into his eyes. There was a question in his eyes that Newt wasn’t entirely sure he knew the answer to, but it didn’t matter, because Thomas seemed to find what he was looking for. In two quick movements Thomas took a step back and grabbed Newt’s hand dragging him off towards one of the many guest-rooms. Newt only looked over his shoulder once to see a small group of their friends staring after them, Chuck whooping loudly while Minho, Gally and Alby looked incredibly bitter and confused all at the same time. He couldn’t find it in himself to care much about that stuff, though, so instead he followed Thomas, almost stumbling when his friend pulled at his hand insistently and opened the door, shutting it after them immediately when they walked in.  
  
“I’m pretty sure we did it.” Newt stated, slightly dazed and knowing that he was probably a mess.  
  
Thomas shrugged, already untying his tie. “Don’t care about them anymore.” He stated, moving closer, and Newt could do nothing but go with it, because Thomas’ hands were really big and now they were on his cheeks and Thomas was pulling him closer like he couldn’t bear the thought of not kissing him for as much as a second. And Newt wasn’t going to be the one to say no to that kind of attention from a person he’d been crushing on for so long, so he went with it, not able to make the decision to be smart today. Maybe this would be shit tomorrow, but right now there was only Thomas and him and a very, very prominent bulge in both of their trousers.  
  
“Almost came in my pants right out there, Newt. You look so good tonight, you always look so good, and I almost couldn’t help myself.” The brunette muttered, and those words were Newt’s undoing. If he’d had any doubts about whether or not he wanted to go through with this, he definitely didn’t anymore, instead he found himself moving rapidly, throwing his arms around Thomas’ neck and pulling him as close as he could, hungrily catching his lips, because if he could get nothing but this, he would most certainly take it, and he pulled Thomas towards the bed.  
  
He had no idea what to say, no idea how to respond, so he decided to make his actions speak for him instead, pushing Thomas down on the bed and placing himself on top of his hips, moving frantically to unbutton his shirt. The alcohol made it harder, but not really _that_ hard because all together he’d only had about 8 drinks over the span of the entire night and he certainly had the motivation to get the bloody thing off Thomas in as little time as possible.

He was going to be fine, he was in control. He’d just lost enough of his reservations that he wasn’t scared to go for what he wanted anymore. What he’d wanted for years now. For every inch of skin he revealed to himself, he felt his jeans grow uncomfortably tighter, and he was only vaguely aware that he was moving his hips against Thomas’ as he was kissing as much of the sun kissed skin he could get to.  
  
The whole world turned around for a couple of seconds, and Newt felt a little dizzy until he realized that Thomas had flipped them around, and he found his bearings, though only for a second, because Thomas’ hand was pressed against him hard, and a soft moan tore itself from his throat. “Shit, Newt, you’re so hard.” Thomas stated, as though that was really a surprise to any of them, and Newt bucked his hips against his hand, whining low in the back of his throat.  
  
“Tommy, if you’re just going to sit there, I need you to take my pants off, or I might die.” He stated, surprised at his own ability to be coherent at a time like this. Thomas was clearly impressed as well, because a shaky, impressed laughter left his lips, and he instantly obeyed orders, pulling Newt’s jeans of him with a bit of difficulty.  
  
“Fucking jeans, do you even understand how it felt to have you sitting there in my lap like that?” he muttered under his breath, a steady stream of filth spilling from his lips while he worked to free Newt of the devil-material, nibbling and kissing at the skin that he revealed while he worked.  
  
Newt raised his head from the pillow, not wanting to miss a single second of it, and looked down at him, chest moving up and down rapidly as he tried to catch his breath enough for him to ask, “How did it feel?” and he knew that it was a lame question, he knew that he was being a major dork, but hearing Tommy describe how much he’d been turned on by him would probably be the greatest thing to ever happen in Newt’s life.  
  
“Just, you don’t even understand how great your ass is,” Thomas started, unable to supress the victorious sound he made when he finally managed to get Newt’s jeans off after fumbling with his shoes for a while, and then he was so, so close again, pressing against Newt, and Newt was certain he’d never see anything as hot as Thomas’ defined chest and that smirk coming closer to him, “And then it’s just there, so tight, and it’s pressed against me and you’re _squirming_ because you’re such a nervous little fucker when you don’t know what to do with yourself, and I’m just sitting there, praying to God that I won’t end up stabbing you in the back with my boner, and I didn’t even know you were interested, I thought you hated the thought of this, so I was so scared I’d freak you out, and all I could think of when we were sitting there was just _what if he wasn’t wearing anything, what if I could just get to_ fuck _him right now instead of talking to these miserable fuckers we call friends._ ”  
  
The way Thomas enunciated the ‘fuck’ made a shiver rip through Newt, and he could feel the goosebumps all over his skin. His mouth hung open while he stared at Thomas, completely dumbstruck because who the hell had known that Thomas could speak like that, and why hadn’t they told him? Oh wait, maybe that was really a good thing, because if Newt had known that Thomas’ mouth could spew this sort of filth his resolve to ignore his crush would have broken that much quicker.  
  
“Then do it, Tommy. Our friends aren’t here.” he managed through his dry throat, and Thomas flashed him a bright smile that really shouldn’t have fit in this situation, but it did and Newt knew that he was lost. Thomas sat up and grasped him through his boxers, and Newt was pretty sure he could die happy now, because he was so high strung that he’d almost forgotten how to think, and there Thomas was, palming him through his underwear, and Newt was pretty sure he was already leaking.  
  
There was one problem though. "What about... Stuff?" Newt asked, knowing how inexperienced he sounded, because honestly he hadn't tried anything close to this before, and watching porn definitely hadn't prepared him for the onslaught on his senses that had left him nearly delirious. Thomas decided that this was a good time to take Newt’s boxers off and start jerking him for real, and Newt’s brain almost exploded with the friction that he’d been craving for what felt like an eternity already. He was getting impatient, so he tried shooting Thomas a stern glance, but failed completely.

  
Maybe it was just because that was Thomas smiling down at him _while giving him a fucking handjob_ and that just did things to his heart _and_ his private parts that he really wasn’t equipped to deal with. “Tommy!” he ground out between clenched teeth, going for stern but ending up on sort-of-angry-sort-of-desperate instead. Was anything going to go as planned tonight? Not that he was complaining right now.

  
"Don't worry, I'm sure there's something here. Minho's big brother sleeps here when he's home from college." Thomas muttered, seemingly a lot more composed than Newt, though Newt could tell that the bulge in Thomas’ pants must’ve started getting uncomfortable some time ago.

  
He decided to do something about that, so he sat up the best he could and fumbled with the button and the zipper a bit before managing it and looking up at Thomas as he pulled his jeans down. "But why would he-"

Thomas cut in, pressing his lips to Newt’s in a short, sweet kiss and pulled back. "He's about as gay as they come, really don't want to talk more about him, thinking of the older version of Minho is doing bad things to my boner." He stated, and Newt definitely wouldn’t want that, so he hesitated for a second before batting Thomas’ hand away from his crotch softly and taking a deep breath.  
  
He’d never done this before, and truth be told, he was terrified. The mix of arousal and extreme fear that he would do something wrong wasn’t entirely pleasant, but he pushed it to the back of his mind and darted his glance to Thomas’ eyes for a second (and instantly felt better, and he hated himself for being such a sap) before moving to wrap his lips around his alleged boyfriend.  
  
The small breath Thomas drew in could have been good or bad, but the moan that followed and the way he fisted his fingers in Newt’s hair couldn’t be anything but good, so Newt swallowed the best he could around him and started bobbing his head up and down ever so softly. He wasn’t going to get himself choked to death on Thomas’ cock, that would be the most embarrassing way to die, so he didn’t want to go too fast. Instead he settled for stroking the backs of Thomas’ thighs while trying to swirl his tongue around the head, unsure if he was doing this right, but if Thomas’ shaky breaths were anything to go by he wasn’t doing _bad._  
  
“Shit, Newt, you don’t know how good you look.” Thomas muttered, making Newt’s cock twitch slightly and his cheeks flush at the same time, a low moan tearing from his throat, and it seemed like that was the right thing to do, because Thomas bucked slightly and made a noise closer to a whimper than to a groan, and Newt knew that he was so lost, but he focused on not choking on Thomas instead of noting exactly how much his heart clenched at the mere thought that he was _having sex with Thomas._ “Newt,” Thomas muttered, pulling his fingers through Newt’s hair softly, and Newt flicked his gaze upwards to look at him, not stilling his movements.  
  
The look on Thomas’ face was worth every second. His pupils were dilated, and he was looking at Newt like he was the sun, the moon and the stars combined. His skin was glistening slightly with sweat, his jaw clenched, and his hips twitched a bit, like he was trying not to buck again, and Newt really appreciated it, but he appreciated the taut abs and the way his thighs were clenching more. “If you keep going I-“ Thomas drew in another shaky breath, “I won’t be able to fuck you.”  
  
Newt let him go with a small, obscene pop and smirked at him. “Wouldn’t bloody want that now, would we?”  
  
Thomas groaned and pounced, and in seconds Thomas was on him, kissing him to hungrily, so aggressively that Newt could easily tell himself that Thomas wanted him like this all the time, and he did, he allowed himself to believe that, so he ground his hips back up against Thomas, clutching at his back-muscles just the way he’d wanted to for so long, and he kissed him back with everything he had, desperate to leave a lasting impression.  
  
“Just a second,” Thomas muttered after another five minutes of heavily making out, and then he moved and rummaged around the drawer in the night table before letting out a victorious sound and pulling a small tube and a condom out. “Thank you, Minho’s brother.” He smirked, and Newt’s insides twisted in expectation and need when he found his way back to his spot between Newt’s legs. “Tell me if you need me to stop, yeah?” Thomas muttered, and the way his eyes turned suddenly soft made Newt flush brightly. He’d sort of hoped it didn’t show that he hadn’t done this before. He felt like he’d done a good job tonight, but apparently it did show, and he vowed to change that… as soon as Thomas got to things instead of just sitting there and looking at him because it was sort of unnerving, even if the way Thomas smiled at him was pleasant enough in itself.  
  
So maybe he had some insecurities. He knew that he wasn’t as fit as his friend, but he didn’t _hate_ his body. Thomas’ glance was just so intent that it made him feel a bit weird, like he should cover up or something, but he decided against it and started sitting up instead, going to another kiss. He was surprised when Thomas put a hand square on his chest and shook his head. “No. Later. I’m gonna make you feel real good, Newt. Gonna make sure this is good for you.” He stated, and Newt was starting to absently wonder if he should get his heart checked out, because really, all this clenching and jumping couldn’t be completely healthy, could it?  
  
He was effectively ripped from those thoughts, though, when something cool and slick pressed against his entrance and he yelped slightly. “That’s _cold_ you bloody-“ he started, squirming slightly and opting for not finishing his sentence because Thomas had just promised to do his best end insulting him didn’t seem very nice. He’d save the insult for another time. Instead he tried spreading his legs a little further, and he braced himself for the first finger, sucking in a breath and doing his best to relax.  
  
The intrusion felt weird. It wasn’t bad, it was… well, it was strange but good, really, and Thomas seemed relieved that Newt wasn’t hurting. It stung a bit, but most dominant of all was the overwhelming sense that as soon as he got used to it, it would be amazing. Thomas shifted tentatively, a look of pure focus on his face that Newt wanted to kiss off because it was so adorable, and then he started moving a bit, crooking his finger slightly inside him and Newt’s hips bucked uncontrollably when a spark of pleasure shot through him, and he knew his eyes were huge with surprise, because he hadn’t expected a jolt of pleasure like this so soon, he’d expected that he’d have to wait a bit before it got really good, but now he found himself twisting his hips, trying to get Thomas to hit that spot again, and he fisted his fingers in the comforter and tried to hold onto the moan that was threatening to leave his mouth. But Thomas was there, looking at him like he was heaven, and he was fingering him slowly, so maddeningly slow that Newt wanted to punch Thomas or himself or both _because he should have known that Thomas would be a tease, the bloody fucker_.  
  
“One more.” He growled, beyond caring that the order sounded harsh, beyond caring about much but the thought of Thomas inside him, because he’d been hard for _ages_ now and he was starting to feel a lot more desperate than he liked to be, and Thomas was _hesitating_.  
  
“But Newt, I don’t want to rush it too much, you might get hurt.” Thomas argued, frowning slightly, and Newt knew it must be heard for him because Thomas obviously wanted to hurry as well, but he was trying to hold back for Newt, and in any other situation Newt would have loved him even more for that, but right now he was way too caught up in this to focus on how sweet Thomas was actually being, so instead he glared at him (the effect of which was probably a bit broken up by the fact that he was half-naked, sweaty and blushing) and pressing himself down on the single finger inside him.  
  
“I swear to God, Tommy, if you don’t-“ And Thomas had the audacity to start laughing, shaking his head and adding another finger, and that _definitely_ stung, but Newt really wasn’t in the mood to wait much longer, so he focused on the pleasure instead, unable to focus on much else really, because it might sting, but Thomas had started jerking him again, this time with his hand slicked up with plenty of lube, and the pleasure and pain mingled and turned into something completely new that Newt would probably fantasize about for months.  
  
The sting slowly faded, and in its place was the rapid build of expectation and pleasure, and Newt was certain he wouldn’t be able to take this very long, so when Thomas flexed his fingers inside him, scissoring and stretching Newt clenched his eyes closed. He was clutching at the fabric below him again and focusing on _not_ looking at him, because the way Thomas looked at him did _not_ make it any easier to stay in control. His hips was bucking regularly now, and he couldn’t even bring himself to ask Thomas for the third finger, so when Thomas made the decision on his own all he could do was whimper softly and press himself down on him harder.  
He’d never expected his first time to be like this, he’d always hoped it would be with Thomas, but he’d never actually _thought._ He hadn’t dared to ever let himself believe that it _could_ happen, and maybe he was a little drunk and sentimental, and maybe there was still a sting, but he felt tears starting to form at the corners of his eyes. So when Thomas leaned in and kissed him slowly breaching himself and lubing himself up, his heart clenched again, and he nodded without even having to open his eyes to know that Thomas was waiting for permission, and he took a shaky breath to steady himself, “Please do it, Tommy, not gonna bloody last much longer if you don’t.” he whispered, and he didn’t know if Thomas heard or just sensed it, but seconds later the brunette was pushing into him slowly, and Newt’s eyes shot open, his entire body overwhelmed with the sensation, and Thomas stopped instantly in seeing the tears in his eyes.  
  
“Newt?” he asked, and Newt shivered from head to toe, his whole body reacting to the fact that _Thomas was inside him_ but not even all the way.  
  
So he shook his head and buried his face in Thomas’ shoulder, pulling him as close as he could. “I’m fine, please move, I just really want you to move.” And though Thomas hesitated for a couple of seconds, Newt could always trust him to do what was best for him, so he moved and when he was filly sheathed inside him he pulled his torso back a bit so he could see Newt’s face. And then he smiled that soft smile, the worried one that Newt hated so much because it meant that Thomas was only thinking of Newt, not of himself, and he shot him a dark glance before grabbing onto his neck and pulling him down roughly, smashing their lips together and canting his lips up against him, “If you don’t fuck me properly right now, you bloody idiot, I’m going to _fuck myself_ on you, we’re doing this one way or another, and don’t you dare look at me like I’m some fragile flower or I swear to God I will see to it thatyou never get to fuck anyone again ‘cause you’ll be lacking the equipment.”  
  
And yet again Thomas burst out laughing against his lips. It felt way better than it should, because Thomas _wasn’t_ supposed to laugh right now, but he was and Newt groaned in annoyance, which prompted Thomas to start moving his hips, first slowly and then faster, setting a rhythm. “I would’ve loved to see you fuck yourself on my dick, Newt. Bet you’d look really sexy on top of me.” He muttered, and another hot surge of arousal shot through Newt, making him moan, because how the hell was Thomas so good at reading his moods that he knew that this was exactly what Newt needed from him right now?  
  
It made him worry for just a second that Thomas had actually seen right through him and figured this crush out, but then Thomas angled his hips in just the right way and Newt saw stars. His hand ripped from the fabric underneath him to press themselves against the soft skin of Thomas’ shoulders, fingers digging into him and his eye-sight went slightly blurry for just a second when Thomas sucked on the skin of his neck _hard,_ and Newt couldn’t stop himself from arching against him, grinding his hips as hard as he could against Thomas, craving any kind of friction he could possibly get.  
  
“I gotcha, Newt.” Thomas muttered, snapping his hips a little faster while his fingers squeezed around Newt, moving in the same rhythm as his hips, and with the other one he caught the hand Newt was just about to use to push Thomas’ hair out of his face. He laced their fingers together and pressed them to the bed, using the support there for momentum and thrust his hips just two more times before they both came, panting, and Thomas collapsed on top of him, momentarily punching the air out of Newt’s lungs.  
  
And yeah, he should tell Thomas to move, they should find a way to get washed up, maybe they should actually leave the party because they probably reeked of sex and alcohol, but Newt couldn’t bring himself to move just yet. Instead he closed his eyes for a second and dozed off.  
  
When he woke up Thomas was gone.  
  
At first he was confused, and then the pain and anxiety laced into his mind. Thomas had left. Thomas had regretted it and had gone. Newt sat up, groaning slightly because his head was pounding and he was sore as hell, and then he looked down. Thomas seemed to have wiped him off, and Newt scrambled out of the bed to find his clothes, eyes stinging and heart pounding. Shit. He was feeling suddenly very sober, terrified even, that he’d really managed to fuck everything up between them, and he could still hear some of the others yelling and laughing out at the pool when he slipped out the door.


	3. In which they find out whether or not the idea was actually good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And just when he turned around and was about to leave a very familiar mop of brown curls appeared from the side. Chuck had obviously heard everything, and that only made Thomas feel even worse.
> 
> “YOU TWO!” Thomas almost jumped out of his skin when Chuck’s words sounded, shocked at the volume because honestly he hadn’t even known that the squirt could scream that loud. Newt was frozen in front of him, obviously just as shell-shocked. Chuck was breathing heavily.
> 
> Minho and Alby were staring in awe. Gally had just dropped a piece of bread into his lap and wasn’t moving to pick it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Prompted by [anon](http://newmas.tumblr.com) of Tumblr as a part of [this challenge](http://drinkwithmegrantaire.tumblr.com/post/99486012115/oops-made-a-newmas-bingo-card-lets-be-real-im). Also please kudos and feedback and all that jazz.  
> 2\. This verse is done now. Strangely satisfied and sad at the same time. This is actually the first multi-chapter fic I've ever finished. Idk if that's a good or a sad thing when you consider I've been writing for so long, lol.  
> 3\. I LOVE hearing from you guys. As in, you don't understand how happy you make me, your support is like really intense and it gives me so much joy, so if you wanna hit me up on tumblr and bounce ideas off me, talk headcanons or just say hi you can hit my [askbox](http://drinkwithmegrantaire.tumblr.com/ask). I have no life, so I'm almost always there. I'm currently closed for prompts but I _will_ re-open at some point. Currently I have 25 projects waiting for me, some I've begun, some not. Either way - THANK you for reading, thank you for being so amazing and nice, and thank you for all the supersuper lovely messages you've sent me! Ilu babes  <3 Best fandom ever!

Okay, so everything had gone to shit. Thomas had screwed up, and he was painfully aware of it. Usually Thomas didn’t dwell on those things because he knew that the past couldn’t be helped, and his memory had never even been a good one, but this time he’d really fucked things up. Literally. Fucked. Them. Up. The thing was, though, that this wasn’t far enough away that he could ignore it, and he didn’t want to. Newt and Minho were his best friends, and Newt meant… Newt meant everything to him. Everything in the world, and the thought of losing him because Thomas had screwed up was enough to drive the alcohol from his system and send his brain into overdrive.   
  
He’d slipped out for a couple of seconds, wanting Newt to be able to sleep, and went out to their friends. He had to show his face, somehow establish that what had happened had happened without bragging about what Newt and him had just done. Tell them that they were a thing now. He’d been so giddy, so happy with the thought that maybe, just maybe, this was working out. Newt wouldn’t have fucked him to prove a point. He was certain he wouldn’t, but then Thomas had left to talk to the others and get Newt a glass of water (because when he’d woken up from his own brief slumber he’d been so thirsty he’d almost started coughing, only managing to stop because he didn’t want to wake the sleeping blonde up), and when he’d come back Newt was gone. He didn’t understand why, something must definitely be wrong, and with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach he realized that Newt was probably regretting that they had ever hooked up.  
  
That thought brought a pounding headache and a wave of nausea over him, and Thomas sat down on the bed, hiding his face in his hands. What the hell had he been thinking? If Newt had wanted him he would have done something about it, it wasn’t like Thomas was brilliant at hiding this stupid crush of his. He was basically as see-through as glass, and to think that Newt would want him for real if he hadn’t been drunk and in the middle of a bet… it had been stupid, and he felt horrible for taking advantage of his best friend. He’d let himself believe that Newt really wanted him, he thought he’d seen something in his eyes, but Newt had snuck out the minute Thomas left the room, and if he felt like the biggest creep in the universe to have used the fact that he was drunk and then just left. He’d intended to come back and hold him like Newt deserved, but he’d missed his window, and maybe that was even going to be a good thing, because if Newt didn’t want him to be that… He winced at the thought and the nausea grew and grew inside him until he finally got himself together and left the room. He needed air, and without saying a word to anyone he left the house.  
  
The walk home was heavy. Thomas had felt completely sober when he realized that Newt had gone, but now he just felt slightly dizzy, shocked with himself for how much he’d managed to fuck things up. He fiddled with his phone in his pocket, debating with himself whether or not he should send Newt a text message, and it took him some time’s debating to decide.  
  
Pros of writing Newt: Thomas needed to tell him that he was sorry. That he hadn’t meant to take advantage of him.  
Cons of writing Newt: He probably didn’t want to hear anything from Thomas. Which was completely understandable and fair when Thomas thought of it.  
  
So here he was, wondering and waiting and hating himself. In the end he ended up tapping out the most inadequate text he could have ever sent. A single _I’m sorry._   
  
That night didn’t bring much sleep. Neither did the one the day after. He didn’t get any texts back from Newt, only one from Chuck telling him that they’d won the money and they’d get them on Monday. The thing was that Thomas didn’t want them now, and he certainly didn’t deserve them. He’d pressured Newt into doing this with him, he’d even used Newt’s money problems to get him to do it, and yeah sure, he had been thinking of Newt when he said that, but he hadn’t _only_ been thinking of Newt and that was what made him such a dick. He might just have lost Newt because of it, and if he had Thomas didn’t know if he was ever going to forgive himself.  
  
So he spent his weekend stalking Newt’s Facebook profile and hoping that he’d write. Hoping for any sort of clue on Newt’s mood, hoping that he’d be forgiven. He typed out three different e-mails, six different Facebook messages, three more texts and wrote down five different messages he could leave on Newt’s phone if he could manage calling him without Newt picking up. Every single thing got deleted and the notes he’d written his words on were shoved aside. It was terrible. Thomas couldn’t remember having ever been this lost and feeling so trapped at the same time. It was hell, and when Monday came he even considered skipping school in his desperate need to avoid the inevitable – looking Newt in the eyes and see regret.  
  
But he wasn’t going to. He was going to face this. He was going to say that he was sorry and force himself to be a decent person about this. He couldn’t force Newt to forgive him, but he could say that he was sorry over and over and over until Newt believed him. He needed to, because he just couldn’t bear to lose him. He needed Newt. Newt was his anchor, and he wasn’t going to let go of that just because he’d screwed up.  
  
He would get over his crush. Maybe not today or tomorrow, not even in a month or a year, but he would. They’d go to different colleges and only see each other on the weekends, and that would be healthy for him, even if the thought of not seeing Newt every day was terrifying to him.   
  
So he picked himself up off the floor of his room (where he’d been lying sulking because he’d lost the energy to move pretty quickly after getting up. The thought of seeing Newt’s face… it would’ve excited him usually. He was always stoked to see his best friend, he had been even before he’d realized his crush on Newt, but today was different.) and he slumped in front of his bowl of cereal at the table, ignoring his mother’s worried glances and ate two mouthfuls before waiting for her to go to the bathroom so he could throw it out without her noticing. And then he started the long, sombre walk to school, because usually he’d drive with Newt, but he didn’t really want to put his money on that happening today, so he walked.   
  
He arrived ten minutes before school. Hating every second. How had he managed to fuck up his life so thoroughly? And the thing was, if it had just been him being uncomfortable that’d be totally fine, but him having upset Newt _and_ probably having to answer questions from their friends, that wasn’t going to be fun. He was a bit worried about how exactly to figure things out, because really he would probably have to admit to the others that Newt, Chuck and him had set them up, which meant admitting that he’d fucked up. There’d be no other explanation for why Newt wouldn’t be talking to him. He rubbed his forehead and stomped inside, all but ignoring Minho when he passed him. “Headache.” He muttered, unable to actually deal with explaining it more than once. And he’d have to. He couldn’t let Newt be the one standing with this.

  
Minho tried to initiate conversation a couple of times until he finally gave up, realizing that to convince Thomas to do anything he’d have to speak loudly – which he wouldn’t since they were in class. It was a pretty good way of getting him to shut up, so Thomas sulked on his own, not paying attention to the class at all, and when it ended he tried slipping out – but was grabbed by the collar. “Spill.”  
  
He shook his head. “It’s nothing, man, just leave it.”  
  
Minho narrowed his eyes and the effect was honestly terrifying. “Spill.”  
  
“It’s just something with Newt, okay. I haven’t talked to him yet, I’ll figure it out and tell you later.” He muttered. He needed to find Newt and figure out what they were going to say to the others because he couldn’t make that decision alone. It wasn’t fair to Newt not to give him a say in this. Most of their friends had known that Thomas wasn’t a virgin, but they also knew that Newt were, and Thomas didn’t really doubt that they’d realized what had gone on in that room after Thomas dragged Newt from the party. Yet another surge of guilt (the feeling was getting old really) and he bit his lower lip hard, leaving for the next class and the one after that before lunch break.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
When he got into the cafeteria he scanned around for Newt. That wasn’t exactly news, he always did, he’d just only realized now. He was always drawn to Newt, like a magnet to metal, like a moth to a flame, and now he was drawn against someone who probably didn’t want him there. Thomas swallowed when he noticed Newt’s face. He looked tired. He was pale, his eyes were bloodshot and he looked… well, sad and angry at the same time. Thomas wanted to punch himself in the face. He was probably going to be awarded “the worst friend ever” and he wouldn’t even be able to say anything about it because it was _painfully_ true. He took a deep breath and moved over. He had to be brave about this. He didn’t have a choice. He’d put himself and his friend in this situation, and he was going to be a grown-up about this. He was going to apologize. He was going to say that he was sorry he’d pressured Newt, he was going to tell him that there was no one in this world that he cared more about, that he would do anything to make it better because he knew that his stupid crush didn’t mean anything if Newt didn’t reciprocate those feelings. He was going to own up to his mistakes. Admit that he shouldn’t have pressured Newt into doing the bet with him and that he shouldn’t have had sex with him when Newt was drunk. Grown-ups were supposed to own up to their fuck-ups and he’d fucked up majorly, using someone who was drunk and inexperienced. Someone he was in love with.  
  
All the words died in his throat when he walked over and the look Newt sent him was so resentful. He looked so hurt, so angry, that Thomas felt a big icy lump of terror in his stomach. He’d broken him. He’d broken something inside Newt and he couldn’t fix it. He’d let him down, and he knew that Newt had been let down a million times before. He didn’t need Thomas to do it as well.  
  
“I… have your money.” He started, and he hated himself the second the words left his mouth. It sounded like he was paying Newt for having sex with him.  
  
It seemed like Newt made roughly the same deduction because he narrowed his eyes, looking around, and Thomas was happy that none of their friends were there yet. “I don’t want the money, Tommy. I want to be left alone.” He snarled, and the ice-chunk in Thomas’ stomach grew and stretched its cold tendrils up into his throat.  
  
“I didn’t mean it like I was paying you for… for that. I just meant that they’re yours. And I wanted to say that I’m sorry, okay?”  
  
Newt’s face was one of pure resentment. “I don’t want your bloody apologies either, Tommy. I want nothing from you than what you’re willing to give, and that’s obviously not much. Couldn’t you at least have waited until the morning to sneak out?” he hissed, and that was definitely a slap to the face.  
  
“Is that what you think I did? Use you and leave?” he asked, and he didn’t trust his own voice because this was too much. A headache began to form, but he pushed it away, forcing himself to focus on the angry blonde in front of him. “Newt I didn’t mean to-“  
  
Newt was standing up now. “I know you didn’t mean to. You didn’t mean to do it, and you regretted it, that’s what people do, but I thought our bloody friendship meant that you could at least be honest with me about your intentions!” he hissed, and Thomas looked around, a bit nervous that he was going to start yelling. He realized that their friends had started joining up, giving them a bit of space, but not sitting far enough away that they couldn’t hear what was being said. He flopped down on the bench in front of Newt, hoping that if he levelled things out a bit, got down so Newt was hovering over him, Newt would understand that he wasn’t looking for a fight. He’d come to apologize, not to upset Newt further.   
  
But instead the blonde got in his face, and the sneer was too icy, too cold, so cold that Thomas immediately looked down. He didn’t know what to say. He had no idea what was happening, the only thing he could actually feel was Newt’s anger. So he picked up his tray again, standing up and getting ready to leave. “I just came to say that I was sorry. I’ll put the money in an envelope and drop them in your mailbox tomorrow at 3. Make sure you get them.” He muttered, not adding the ‘before your mom finds them’. He didn’t trust the woman. She’d ruined so much of Newt’s life, and now Thomas had joined the ranks.  
  
And just when he turned around and was about to leave a very familiar mop of brown curls appeared from the side. Chuck had obviously heard everything, and that only made Thomas feel even worse.  
  
“YOU TWO!” Thomas almost jumped out of his skin when Chuck’s words sounded, shocked at the volume because honestly he hadn’t even known that the squirt could scream that loud. Newt was frozen in front of him, obviously just as shell-shocked. Chuck was breathing heavily.  
  
Minho and Alby were staring in awe. Gally had just dropped a piece of bread into his lap and wasn’t moving to pick it up.  
  
“I didn’t tell you about this stupid bet just so you could fuck things up! I told you about it because we’re all _sick_ of watching you making _gooey eyes_ at each other while _sulking_ because you think the other person don’t want you! And yes, maybe I’d hoped to make a bit of money on it, it could’ve gone more smoothly, it wasn’t supposed to be right at that point, so yeah, I fucked up too, but are you _serious?!_ ” he was breathing even heavier by now, and the cafeteria had gone eerily silent. Thomas didn’t even dare to look around him. Chuck was beet-red and glaring at them. “ _Why_ is Chuck always the one who needs to fix your drama, huh?!”  
  
Thomas piped up, “Chuck we don’t really make that much-“  
  
And the glare he got in return was so terrifying he actually shut up instantly. “Thomas, Newt has been in love with you for three years. He only does the shy-face when you’re there. Newt, Thomas has been grossly in love with you for two years. You’re both morons, and I hate you, I hate myself for telling you about this bet!”  
  
Silence fell again and Chuck was still heaving. Gally discretely picked up his bread and stuffed it into his mouth. Then Minho moved. “Wait. So what you’re saying is that you rigged the bet?”  
  
And then chaos erupted. Their friends started fighting between themselves, and Thomas turned his attention to Newt who was completely and utterly adorable because he was blushing so much Thomas actually felt a surge of worry for him. Then he realized that he was probably blushing himself, so he scratched the back of his neck. “Uh. I think we need to talk.”   
  
Newt nodded mutely, moving around the table without even daring to look at their friends, and Thomas wanted to take his hand, he really did, but he didn’t dare yet. He still wasn’t sure, but the icy fear that had clenched his chest since Friday night was finally subsiding enough that a small glimmer of hope showed. He was breathing through his nose, focusing on his breathing-rhythm and his fingers twitched. He really wanted to take Newt’s hand more than anything, but he couldn’t bring himself to.  
  
Once out in the sunshine he turned around, trying to meet Newt’s eye, but it was made impossible by the way the blonde was scraping at the earth with the tip of his shoe and staring intently at it. “Look, Tommy, it’s fine, you don’t have to say anything. I know that I can’t force you to like me like that-“  
  
Thomas held up a hand. “Wait what? Did you not hear what Chuck just said?” he asked, and Newt looked up, confusion painted clear on his face.  
  
And Thomas understood. Thomas understood that Newt was so used to losing, so used to being let down that he only caught the part that would take Thomas from him. His crush had been revealed first, and in his head that was the only thing that had been revealed. He had probably been so busy beating himself up about this that he hadn’t even noticed that Chuck had kept speaking. So he moved towards him, and Newt took half a step back, shaking his head. “I’m gonna need you to stop bloody touching me for a while, Tommy. If I’m getting over this, I’m going to need some space. You’re my best friend and I’m not leaving you, but I’m gonna need… you have to let me get over you.”  
  
Thomas shook his head violently, moving in again, and this time Newt backed up against a picnic set, which meant that he couldn’t get further away, so Thomas took his chances, put his hands on Newt’s cheeks and pressed his lips against warm, soft, trembling lips for just a second. “I don’t want you to get over it. I don’t want you to not be in love with me. I want you. I’ve wanted you for so long. I didn’t leave that night. I think that night was the best night of my life. I went to get you some water and let the others know that we were fine. I was only out for 15 minutes or something because Minho caught me on the way back and I had to keep talking to him in order to win the bet.” He explained, and Newt’s gaze shot up to his, hopeful in a way that made Thomas feel bad. Newt must’ve felt just as hopeless about everything all weekend as he did. If not even more, seeing as Newt had just lost his virginity with his best friend who he was in love with, only to have that best friend disappear.  
  
“I don’t understand.” Newt said, and his tone was so fragile that Thomas wanted to cry.  
  
Instead he put his forehead against Newt’s, looking into those eyes he’d grown to love so much, and when he saw tears there he pulled Newt close, allowing him to hide his face in Thomas’ own chest. If he knew Newt at all, he’d want to hide his feelings if he could. “I’m in love with you. I… I sort of tried to get you in the bet because I wanted to know what it felt like to be with you. And I know that I was being a horrible friend because I didn’t even know that you were interested, I’ve spent the weekend hating myself for having taken advantage of you.” He promised, softly running his fingers up and down over Newt’s back. He was wearing the light grey mussed up shirt that he always wore when he was sad. “I didn’t mean to use you. I would never… not like that. I couldn’t ever do anything to you because I didn’t care. I’d never be with you and leave. I don’t think I could.”  
  
And if Newt was crying just a bit into his shirt, Thomas didn’t say anything, because he knew that Newt needed this. He needed this safety, and Thomas was perfectly willing to provide just that. It took Newt a minute of silence before he pulled back his head. “So, what you’re saying – just a bloody recap – is that you’ve been in love with me for two years…” he stated, voice growing more and more neutral, and Thomas felt a wave of insecurities crash over him.  
  
“Yes?” he asked, sort of scared that he was just about to get rejected.  
  
“Where we could have been dating and you didn’t say anything, you bloody idiot?” and then Newt did the only thing Thomas had always hoped he would. He threw his arms around Thomas’ neck, and he leaned in and kissed him, and his kisses were like fire, scorching like a forest fire and warm like a night in front of the fireplace. The last remains of the icy tendrils were effectively banished, and Thomas knew that he was never going to let Newt go if he could help it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. I encourage you to join me in imagining Newt finding the notes Thomas wrote when he was practicing what to say if he was ever going to find the courage to call him.  
> 2\. Also imagine Thomas' embarrassment when Newt stuffs all of them into his pockets and looks like a happy puppy.  
> 3\. You may "Aaaawh".


End file.
